In antiquity, the Great Pyramid of Giza the only wonder from the original list still standingthe statue of Zeus at Olympia, the Colossus of Rhodes a new gigantic, version of which is being built todayand others were among the occupants of the list.
The truth is, no matter how singled out or overwhelmed we feel, and no matter what area we are struggling in, we are not alone. More than half of U. All of us have moments of utter despair. Escaping from this hopeless-seeming state may feel impossible.
Yet, in reality, we are not doomed, and we are not powerless. No matter what our circumstances, we can all learn tools to help us emerge from the darkest moments in our lives.
In his 35 years of research, Dr. Salvatore Maddi of The Hardiness Institute has discovered that what predicts how well we will do in life, our relationships, careers, and so on is NOT how much money we have or even how many struggles we face.
We can all learn to become more resilient. We can implement tools that help shape how we see and experience the world around us. This process starts with asking ourselves a few questions, starting with: Whose life are you really living?
In order to have the life we say we want, we have to separate our real point of view from negative influences from our past, from people around us or from society at large.
To do this, we can engage in a process known as differentiationwhich can help us to distinguish our real wants, goals and desires from undesirable outside influences.
According to Firestone, in order for our real, authentic self to emerge, we have to identify and separate from destructive programming we received very early in our lives, primarily from our parents or other influential caretakers. Naturally, no parent is perfect.
We are all human and full of flaws.
Parents may have critical attitudes toward themselves that extend to their children. As people grow up, they tend to incorporate these attitudes and engage in a process of self-parenting. If we had a parent who believed they were unintelligent, we may feel this way toward ourselves.
As adults, we tend to be drawn toward relationships and circumstances that recreate the emotional environment from our past. Differentiation means interrupting this cycle and truly living our own life.
What truly has meaning to you? Are you looking at your life through a negative filter? Our critical inner voice describes a cruel, internal enemy we all have inside us that comments on our every move and criticizes us at every turn.
This critical inner voice is there to undermine and sabotage us in every area of our lives, our careers, relationships and personal goals. One of the biggest steps we can take to change our lives involves identifying and challenging this inner critic. We can all learn effective methods to overcome our critical inner voice and achieve a more self-compassionate attitude toward ourselves.
No matter how anxious it makes us, we can counteract this inner critic and grow stronger in the process. Then, we can consciously take the actions that go against the directives of this anti-self. We can go out for that job interview, knowing we can handle not getting it.
We can stick to an exercise plan even when our inner critic lures us to indulge. We can stay close to our partner despite the anxious thoughts our critical inner voice shouts at us.
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